What? Your Love Issues Weren’t Really “Yours” To Begin With? Discover The Murky Underworld Of Societal Influence On Relationships…
Did you ever wonder why your path in love has been the way it has? Did you ever find yourself thinking, why does this keep happening to me? Why do I attract people like XYZ?
Today’s article is about the deeper secret reasons for exactly that! Often, we don’t realize the underlying factors that are affecting our love and relationship dynamics from behind the scenes.
The following 5 keys are eye-opening spiritual insights I’ve been shown and discovered in my work with coaching love and relationship clients…
1) THE MAJORITY OF YOUR LOVE ISSUES AREN’T REALLY “YOURS”
Did you know, often people’s recurring disappointments and tendencies in love aren’t even really “theirs”?
This can sound a bit frightening or strange, but let me explain and you’ll see how it works.
Consider this: As children we observe our parents’ relationships, our friends’ parents… And unconsciously we “map out” in our minds and emotions how relationships are expected and “supposed” to work… As we grow older, we’re told by TV, magazines, peers and others what love is all about before we even experience it ourselves…
So most of us don’t start with blank pages when we enter into relationships – we carry the mental and emotional baggage of other people’s experiences with love! And this can bring a lot of complications… Nearly ALL of us have absorbed others’ and collective issues with the ideas of men vs women, what to expect from dating and in a marriage and so on.
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Have you struggled with unreliable guys? Or had people try to walk all over you? It could be more rooted in these lingering patterns than you have realized…
In order to fully enjoy the most blissful relationship you can imagine, the kind of love you’d dream of, you may have to start to RE-IMAGINE what love looks like…
Becoming conscious of the stories you carry around is key to uplifting your love life for the long run. And you truly can! You’ll be surprised how much begins to change when you fine-tune your emotional and mental perspective. Above all, open up to the knowing that more is possible!
2) IDEAL WOMEN/MEN VS. CELEBRATING YOUR UNIQUENESS
You may unfortunately have been deflecting ideal love because you were “tricked” to try to be like someone else, to live up to an ideal constructed by society… A repeating message from the soul is that Love is not about sacrificing the self. You do not need to give up your own identity to join together with a love partner and enjoy your ideal relationship.
On the contrary: You need to be as much “you” as possible in this, it cannot be done without “you”! So celebrate your individuality. It’s the key to attracting the mate that’s perfect for YOU, and to enjoy a healthy and satisfying dynamic with the partner you may already have!
You do not need to look like an A list celebrity, be a millionaire, bodybuilder or a Victoria’s Secret angel to join together in a blissful relationship.
We don’t have to adhere to society’s idea of what perfection is. Your version of perfection is as unique as you are! And so is your ideal relationship.
You are the way you are for a reason – that is your secret magic power!
3) THE “STANDARD RELATIONSHIP TRACK” VS. VISUALIZING YOUR IDEAL TO MAKE IT HAPPEN
In a related point, you may have heard of the Law of Attraction and the power of visualizing your ideal relationship to attract it into your life… This is something I see causing headaches for a lot of people.
BECAUSE: Did you realize you may have been “tricked” by society to visualize “badly”?
I.e. the underlying messages you’ve received from media, peers and relatives about love may have had you “automatically” visualizing fear scenarios and dissatisfaction – so you’ve attracted less than what you truly want and deserve!
In order to resolve this, begin consciously visualizing your ideals. Take back the reins of your mind’s eye. “Brainwash” yourself with positivity to attract it. Make a vision board of what you want.
Visualize your dream come true: You and your ideal lover are happily together – what is that like for you? What are you wearing? Where are you? What are they saying to you? How do you feel? What scents are around you?
Now you’re in your power of manifesting YOUR desires, not someone else’s disappointment!
4) CRITICISM VS. FORGIVING YOURSELF
Again, we’re dealing with “society”… Because of our modern culture of high ideals and advertising’s push for “perfection” you may have been holding yourself in harsh judgment. You may have (like so many of us) been walking around feeling like you’re not “good enough”…
And unfortunately this state could have been blocking others from loving and appreciating you for who you fully are (watch a video on how this works here). Because when we feel unworthy on some level, we energetically deflect love.
On our journey of love, it’s as much about your own inner Alchemy as the one unfolding between you and your partner. Loving yourself is downright essential … especially because most of us grow up with the opposite habits, of self criticism, self doubt, self loathing…
So take a few minutes and apologize to yourself for any harsh judgments you may have made along the way. You didn’t deserve you to be so hard on yourself. You deserve love, you deserve to be unconditionally accepted and treasured for exactly who you are.
And you know what? That love is out there and inside you already – start shifting your vibration so you come into range with it. If we’re on a low frequency, we’re out of tune with Love. It’s there, but we can’t feel it.
Shift your energy to showing YOURSELF love, to begin receiving more love from others.
5) ACCEPTING OTHERS’ “REALITY” VS. AIMING FOR THE SKIES!
Another reason why things have been the way they have for you, is what you have believed possible. What you have aimed for.
In your upbringing you were likely shown what to expect from love and relationships – and that’s what you thought was possible.
But remember this – bigger dreams than yours have come to fruition before. Don’t be afraid to aim high! Remember that if you aim low, all you’ll ever get is that low point. Practice aiming higher, stretching your reach, because we live in a big world of over 7.5 billion people – amazing love is possible more now than it ever was. Your dream is never truly out of reach!
(Did you know that in spiritual truth, if you have a desire the path to that desire fulfilled exists? That is the nature of consciousness!)
So if you were going to go down in history for something, what would it be? If you were going to tell your grandkids a story about your life or about love, what would you want the story to be? You are the author of the book of you: be very conscious about which stories you tell yourself about who you are and what you’re capable of!
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I really hope you found this article insightful. One thing I can tell you from all my work with clients and my own journey is: things really can change! You never have to settle – you are here as such a unique and special person and there is such a wonderful journey ahead of you if you open up to it.
What were you told or shown about love and relationships, that you can see became an experience in your life? Do comment below!